Rides as old as time, out-dated to say the least. While we can only marvel and admire the many options for attractions throughout Disney Parks, we have to admit that some of them are lipstick on a pig at this point. Nostalgia is carrying the load and it trumps the fact that time is simply passing these classic attractions by. But have no fear because we at Believe Vacations always have the solutions!
Welcome to Believe Vacation’s Top Ten where today, we’ll look at the Top 10 Attractions Needing a Refurbishment. For this list, we look at attractions throughout the parks that are in desperate need of an update for any reason that will be explained in the entry. So here’s hoping the talented Imagineers are ready to do some work and let’s get this list hopping with:
10) The Many Adventure of Winnie the Pooh (Magic Kingdom) – The easy answer is to change the ride to a toad on a wild ride!!! But we are looking forward. Technically still one of the newer rides in the Magic Kingdom, this ride in a bouncy honey pot does have some fun visuals like the Heffalump and Woozle scene but in all honesty, it’s a glorified dark ride at a county fair.
How to refurb – Make it a fun children’s play place ala the old Honey I Shrunk the Kids exhibit at Hollywood Studios. Take out the honey pots and make it a walking exhibit. Withstand the blasts of wind on a blustery day; turn the Heffalump and Woozle scene into a crazy mirror maze; have a Tigger bouncy room. You know, kids stuff adults would want to do.
9) Dinosaur (Animal Kingdom) – I actually like everything about Dinosaur once the ride starts. The story of going back in time, the vehicle you travel in, the encounters with different dinosaurs and the final scene are intense enough to be a thrill ride but fun enough that little kids will smile. As a ride, it’s one of the top in the Animal Kingdom.
How to refurb – The pre-show is unfortunately very outdated. Tying in the story behind the Disney movie Dinosaur sounds like a good idea but not too many people remember (or saw) that movie. And without giving too many spoilers, we do we have to help a scientist get what he wants? Why can’t we just go on a mission to the time of the dinosaurs when an incident happens and we come face to face with evil carnivores?
8) Chester and Hester’s Dino-Rama (Animal Kingdom) – Wild animals, nature, conservation, midway carnival games?? One of these things is not like the other, and Chester and Hester’s Dino-Rama at the Animal Kingdom just doesn’t belong. Like at all! Outside of scamming tourists out of single bills to play classic midway games, I really can not find any reason why the Imagineers thought this was a good idea and why it still remains today.
How to refurb – Think Jurassic World-ish and turn it into a fun dinosaur exhibit. I have seen traveling groups who use puppetry to bring dinosaurs to life, use animatronics to ride dinosaurs and still have the dino-themed bouncy houses and inflatables. Add in some life-size dinos with stats and figures on each species and you instantly have a land that ties into the Animal Kingdom as it was intended.
7) Tomorrowland Speedway (Magic Kingdom) – While it’s one of my Top Smells, it’s one of the most outdated attractions on the grounds. We will never get pedal-to-the-metal, crashing around the track go-karts, but, minimal effort could spice up the track to cater to the next generation.
How to refurb – Make it a mini Radiators Springs and turn the vehicles into our favorites from the Cars franchise. What kid would not want to sit behind the wheel and race as Lightning McQueen or Tow Mater? While we’re at it, reskin the front entrance from the Indy 500 look to the Cars branding and logos.
6) “it’s a small world” (Magic Kingdom) – I must tread lightly here because there is a reason it is still a popular attraction. Nostalgia alone will keep people visiting the little animatronic children of the world who have nothing better to do then sing the same song in different languages to you.
How to refurb – Again, very small detail here but the goal of this attraction is to represent the countries in dress and voice. Why not in words as well? In each section, have a small monitor with the lyrics in the native language on them so you can see what they are singing. Just a small extra touch that will stay in line with the respect to the cultures and not take away from the timelessness of the attraction.
5) The Great Movie Ride (Hollywood Studios) – When I was young and MGM opened up, this attraction was the one I always wanted to do because I wanted to “ride the movies.” Of course, a whole other theme park in Orlando opened a couple years later fulfilling that actual dream, but this ride still made it possible to be in the middle of the classics.
How to refurb – First, the pre-show showing classic trailers is a great idea, however, the ones at the Sci-Fi Diner are more recent. So let’s get some newer trailers. During the ride, give us more live character interactions. How cool would it be if the Wicked Witch of the West decided to hop off the stage and start terrorizing your tram?
4) Peter Pan’s Flight (Magic Kingdom) – Anyone who knows Disney can tell you that there is always going to be a wait for this attraction. It’s one of the best animated movies in the Disney catalog plus, you get to ride in a flying pirate ship! Regardless of the outdated figures throughout the attraction, it’s pretty cool.
How to refurb – This one is easy – tear down the track and rebuild it to the design Shanghai Disney has. Now that is a ride I would not mind waiting over an hour for! Flying through the nursery and Neverland with a perfect blend of animations and moving animatronics would be a significant upgrade from flying over the statues that currently reside within the attraction.
3) Carousel of Progress (Magic Kingdom) – Another delicate entry here but the refurb fix is obvious. Before we get there though, if Disney does announce any refurbishments for this classic attraction, Disney veterans should rejoice, because there are rumors every year that it will be the last for CoP. So keep the refurb coming Disney!
How to refurb – Keep scenes 1, 2 and 3 and update scene 4 from 1980s to 2030s. Does that mean that our loveable host lives to be over 120+ years old? Yes. Does it matter? No. Give us a real, accurate look into today’s future and hopefully Uncle Orville will still be asking for a root beer!
2) Country Bear Jamboree (Magic Kingdom) – In the same boat as the Carousel of Progress, the Country Bear Jamboree is an entertaining show, but heavily outdated. Listen closely next time you’re in bear hall and you’ll hear the clicking sounds of the eyes blinking for all the characters. Keep the songs, keep the witty humor and terrible jokes, but…
How to refurb – Make the animatronics smoother. The herky-jerky motions, the mechanical stares and rough transitions were fine for the opening of the Magic Kingdom in the 70s. Surely it won’t take much to spice up the longest reigning concert art in the Magic Kingdom for another 40 years!
Honorable Mention
Astro Orbiter – Rockets going round and round? Boring and in desperate need of a launch into the next century!
Space Mountain – Let’s go next level here Disney – make it 3D while adding the 4D effects of mist and asteroids in your face.
Epcot Films – These films are important if you really want to learn about a country. It would help if they were produced in the 2010s at least.
1) Muppet Vision 3D (Hollywood Studios) – The Muppets are funny. This show is funny. This show is also almost 30 years old and has not updated itself once. And because it’s the combination of the Muppets and Disney, it has the potential to be so much more than just a 10-minute gag reel.
How to refurb – Since Muppet Vision 3D came out, the Muppets have produced 5 more movies, at least 5 television specials, a dozen classic YouTube videos, had a TV series and introduced countless new characters. With that much mainstream exposure keeping this family friendly franchise alive, it’s time to play the music and time to light the lights a little brighter for some of our favorite pop culture characters!
Did I miss anything? What are some attractions that need some TLC? Leave your comments below and as always, there’s a great, big, beautiful tomorrow!
